Untrue Rumors

Dear Claire,

I have always been afraid of rumors and they have finally caught up with me.  This kid in my school has been spreading stuff about me and I want to scream to everybody that I’m not the crack-head whore he says I am.  I am 12 years old!

Nobody seems to care.  My parents just say, “oh, well.”  I can’t just ignore this rumors, I just want to punch this guy’s lights out!  What should I do?

Angry in Alabama

Dear Angry,

You have just told me “no one cares.”  Guess why?  Because people don’t believe any of this bull and because rumors come and go all the time and even kids know better than to really believe them.

Plus people will soon find more exciting rumors to replace this one.  That is what ALWAYS happens.

One more thing:  guess who is really happy to see you upset?  The dude who began the rumors.  Don’t give him the joy and satisfaction of seeing you angry.  Keep your head high and if someone makes any comments about the stories they’ve heard, just give them a really cold look, say calmly: “I can’t believe you are talking about this garbage to me,” and then walk away.

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

Dear Claire,

I have a big problem... Here goes, I am 26 with three kids (ages 5, 6 & 8), who are my life.

I have been seeing a guy (off & on) for over two years, which has been great.  The problem... he lives 250 miles away.  Neither of us is willing to relocate for the other.  Why?  He works for the highway patrol in Needles... which is not known for “real crime,” just your basic speeding tickets.

I am a single mother who still needs assistance from her mother.  She watches my kids, takes them to doctor visits and after school activities while I work.  So, I cannot leave because my mother won't go with me.

Should I stop seeing this man with whom I seem to be falling in love?  Or should I relocate and see what happens between us, and figure something out about my daycare problem.

Oh, did I mention he supports his college brother who lives in Miami?  Well he does, and that is another reason he won't move out this way, because it's too expensive and he won't have the extra cash as he does now if he relocated for me.

What should I do?

CeCe In Love

Dear In Love,

CeCe, from where I sit, this doesn’t look like a relationship that is solid enough to cause you to relocate, at least not yet.  Has he asked you to relocate?  Has he proposed to you with the condition that you move?  What has he offered you to get you to uproot your kids, move away from your family and start life over with him?

My dear, I wouldn’t move across the street for a man unless he proposed marriage, and even then not before I felt completely sure of my feelings for him, which you don’t seem to be.  Don’t accept anything less than what you need and deserve, especially when there are children involved.